Always
by AnonymousBluesilver
Summary: I bet yuki regrets it now, embarrassed at how easily he was manipulated into your oblivious trap......Shuichi confesses his true outlook on kitizawa and leaves an eternal message between Lover and Stone


Chapter 1:

Light, white snow flakes fall on my head and shoulders, but they go unnoticed. I only see what is ahead of me…a stone, but not just any stone, His stone.

"You know he still cares you, he just can't seem to let you go…"

I could feel my heart cracking. The words that come out my mouth, those words I've been trying to ignore for the longest of time…I know I'll come to regret this.

I sit on my knees landing on the freezing snow, facing the stone. Lying next to me is a rectangular box. I stare, with melancholy eyes, at the markings as my breath becomes small clouds vanishing into the cold chilly night.

"Or better yet, he just can't stop remembering".

'Yeah, how could you **not** remember something like that...The one, you thought was '_it_' wasn't and betrayed you, Your please for help…ignored, and your only way out…was a pistol'

But the thing was that, Yuki Kitazawa was not the only one gone…a small part of Eiri seemed to have disappeared that day as well. What disappeared was his hearts fiery spark...just as that pistols bullet killed kitazawa: His just…suddenly burned out.

'I bet yuki regrets it now, embarrassed at how easily he was manipulated into your oblivious trap, how you actually made him think true love exists, how you took away his trust in people, how vulnerable you made him feel, how he had grown to love you like a brother, ... how you made him…**_Loveless_**'

"You know, there was at one point I felt jealous of you, but now I'm not too sure how to feel toward you". Because if you didn't do, what you did, I might have not ever met yuki, when I did. He would have still been in New York with you. Who knows…maybe you would have just left him for someone else and I would find yuki and the rest goes on, but then maybe…he would have been able to show his feelings for me a little bit better…who knows, _who knows_, but I know, I don't.

I smirk. Raising my face toward the clouded sky, tears running down my cheeks as falling snow flakes land on me, mingling with my tears.

Nor I, you, or he knows, not anyone knows. It happened already, the past is done, and there's no turning back…just moving forward and that's exactly what he did. So why shouldn't I, but sometimes, I think I remind him of himself when he was with you and it scares him very much, since he thinks he's becoming you.

"I don't want that, I don't want him to think he's becoming his worst fear…I want him to be happy, truly happy"

'I'll go to the ends of the earth for him…I would even end my own world…'

"Even if he says mean things to me, I could tell it's his way of caring for me…and I wouldn't change it a bit, not even for a simple phrase from him…'will you marry me? Shuichi Shindou' now, that would make me really happy, but when it comes to yuki…I could careless about my well being".

I slowly stood up, wiping the wet stains away off my face with my trench coat sleeves.

"And could you believe, I actually missed our anniversary…to have sat here and cry in front of your tomb stone"

"No, he can't…"

I turn.

"Shuichi, do you know how much chaos you've caused back home?"

I smile.

"Why? No, I don't hiro"

Hiro walks toward me. His hands in his pockets protected from the freeze.

"Well, I do…now how about we go back to that 'pain-in-the-ass lover' of yours"

"Sure…so, how about you fill me in on how freaked out everyone is, while we head for the airport…Oh!"

I turn and drop to my knees picking up the box then placing it in front of the stone. I quickly do a silent prayer and leave.

There in the thin box was a dead black and white rose banded together with a piece of red ribbon…the black and white symbol yin and yang while the red ribbon symbolizes blood, at the bottom is a small note attached two the roses…

"_I thank and hate you, yuki kitazawa" _

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Yeah, yeah I know it isn't too written out, and is SHORT,but I just suddenly got the idea and wrote it in an hour in a half.

Oh, yeah and also _I'M HAVING MAJOR WRITER'S BLOCK! _

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**...Until Chapter TWO: Returned (Summary):**

**Shuichi comes back to Japan and yuki is Mad...But it isn't because of shuichi missing their anniversary or visiting kitazawa. **

**I'll give you a little clue, Shuichi didn't say good-bye...and why...well, you'll have to see the next chapter!**


End file.
